If Football Games Lasted 30 Minutes, We'd be 3-0: Lions 26, Vikings 23 (OT)

So here's my Tuesday post following yet another 2nd half collapse, which if you are a Vikings fan, you have already read and heard about every aspect of the Vikings 2nd half suckitude by now. In the spirit of that, I am not going to be writing about the game at all. I may post a bit of a diagnosis later on this week about what I think is wrong with this team, but there is really nothing to sum up that I didn't already say in my week 1 and 2 summaries. You are going to hear the same things over and over ad nauseum until next week: McNabb is not accurate enough, we need to give the ball to AD more in the 2nd half, the defense is good but cannot sustain being on the field for 20+  minutes in the second half, and we need to quit committing stupid/untimely penalties (I'm looking at you, Kenny Onatulu).

After Sunday's result, things are not looking good for this year's team. I thought last year was the ultimate sh*tstorm, but now I wonder what the rest of this season has in store for our squad. My optimism and high hopes going into the season are all but gone, and we now must watch the next 13 games as cynical assholes, because everything we've seen and heard from these Vikings sounds like complete sh*t.

/head asplode.

If Football Games Lasted 30 Minutes, We'd be 2-0: Bucs 24, Vikings 20

Benn Scorin'

        On their home opener, in front of a raucous sellout crowd, the Vikings jumped all over the Buccaneers with an efficient passing attack, explosive runs by Adrian Peterson AND Toby "Phenom" Gerhart, and solid defense. Sound familiar? They went into halftime with yours truly feeling excited to see them continue to play superior football and write about it afterward. Two weeks into the regular season, I'm already feeling a little repetitive. During the first half, I'm all like ZOMG THE VIKEZ R AWSOM!!1! But then the second half starts and the Vikings are all, FFFFFUUUUUUUU.

The Bucs came out and stopped us on our first drive of the second half (thanks in large part to a very questionable holding penalty on what would have been a converted 3rd down) then promptly marched 44 yards in two plays for a touchdown. After the ensuing recovered surprise onside kick, there was a feeling of an impending collapse in my gut. In true Minnesota Viking fashion, we allowed Tampa Bay to drop 24 points on us (including 14 in the final seven minutes) and pry the victory from their brittle, fatigued little Viking fingers. Pundits and talking heads from the the axis of evil and other news sources may say that we have been "out-adjusted" during halftime the past two games. I call bullcrap. How much can a coach do in 15 minutes to render an entire offense stagnant and a defense largely ineffective? This is a matter of sound decision making on the part of the players in clutch situations, a lack of playmakers on both sides of the ball, and endurance. I'll elaborate further after the jump.

Reality hits you hard bro.

Game 1 Recap: Chargers-Vikings

         So the regular season has begun. By now, you probably have all heard about two or three things related to the game: A.)Percy Harvin gave the Vikings possibly their best start to a season in franchise history with a 103-yard opening kickoff return for a touchdown ( during which he also knocked one of the top kickers in the game out for the season--next time you'll know your role Nate Kaeding), B.) Donovan McNabb and our passing game compiled a whopping 39 yards, and C.) the game ended after 3 encroachment penalties, including ones on back-to-back snaps. I first cannot describe the great mood I was in on Sunday. I rarely take the initiative to start boozin' when I am alone, but the return of NFL football en masse was enough to get me pounding down some brewskies in excitement. By the end of a great first half by the Vikes, my mood definitely hit it's peak for the day. Up 17-7, we looked in good position to walk out of week 1 undefeated. Yes, the Chargers shot themselves in the foot with unnecessary penalties occasionally and missed a sure touchdown pass as King Laserface Phillip Rivers floated one just out of the reach of one Vincent Jackson, but the boys were playing good defense, tackling well and getting some strong pressure at times on the QB. The second half was absolutely mind-numbing. I really can't even tell you what I was watching. Swing pass, swing pass, 10-yard in to Gates. Repeat as necessary.  The offense showed me nothing. I'm not even positive they ever came on the field, to be honest. I am happy to announce that I recently ordered a Joe Montana Chiefs '94 throwback jersey, however. It's gonna be dope. Anyway, more after the jump. (My first jump!!!)

Serenity Now.

      After such a head-scratching, frustrating start to the season, I'm gonna take a day or so to decompress and think about what to say. Read some analysis before giving my own. I was in such a good mood at halftime, and then it felt like a cat pissed down my throat for the final 30 minutes of the game. Woo-sah... Woo-sah... In other news, Cam Newton might be the greatest NFL player of all time.. Ravens stomped the Steelers, loved to see that. Romo choked in a way that only Tony Romo knows how, Tarvaris Jackson had four times as many passing yards as our new starter, and we are starting out at the bottom of the NFC North as the only team to be 0-1. Not cool. See you guys soon. Laugh at this in the meantime.

Vikings 28, Texans 0 : Preseason Finale and Regular Season Thoughts

        Welcome back everyone. Today is a big day for every NFL team around the league and a hard day for many players. 27 players that have been working their tails off for the past 6 weeks are going to be either sent down to a practice squad or become a free agent and need to start brushing up on their insurance sales skills.We also found out today that Kevin Williams will be suspended for the first 2 games of the season, finally putting to rest the ridiculous StarCaps case that has drawn out for the past 3 years. One final piece of news: Odin's Eye recently hit 1,000 views!  To hit such a nice benchmark after only a month of existence is giving me some pretty good vibes. Thanks for reading everybody, I'll try my best to keep this stuff interesting. With all that said, let's get to last night's game, then I'll give some predictions the upcoming season in the NFC North Division.


Things I Liked:

Leaving defenders in his wake.

CP7. Christian Ponder looked like a decent quarterback last night. He still looked like a rookie to me, though. He had several late reads and another handful of missed targets. Ponder still isn't making NFL starter throws,  but his athleticism and improvisation ability is impressive. 8 runs for 61 yards for a quarterback isn't something most of us have been used to seeing the past oh, 6 years or so, and he also eluded some pretty fierce pass rushes in order to do so (but save us the spikes in blood pressure and learn how to slide please, Christian).  It was a little disheartening to see that Jake Locker went 15/17 with a touchdown on the ground and through the air for Tennessee, he looks like the real deal, but Ponder looks like he has the makings of a good QB as well. Just not yet.

Awasom, just Awasom.

Adrian Awasom. THIS GUY *Jon Gruden voice* needs to make the team if for no other reason than for his last name. He picked up 2 sacks, on one of which he stripped Texans rookie quarterback T.J. Yates. Awasom also caused a couple other rushed throws and that could be just enough to put him on the roster. However, if the front office chooses Stylez G. White over him, I suppose I won't be completely heartbroken.

'King of the night?

Caleb King. The Vikings just picked Caleb King up as an undrafted free agent after the Supplemental Draft, and he put the ball in the end zone twice. Just as I said above, that could be enough to at least put this rookie on our practice squad. We are pretty set as it is with our three RB's that didn't touch the field last night, but he looks good enough to give a slot on the practice squad.

The Godfather.

Chris Kluwe. He dropped two punts within the Texans' 10 yard line in the 1st quarter and he made up the name for the blog. Those two things combined get him a mention in this week's edition. If you have Twitter, follow him. (@ChrisWarcraft) He probably could get a mention every week under 'things I liked' just for how funny he is on there.


Things I Didn't Like:

Nothing! When you win 28-0 and no one is hurt, there can't be much to complain about. The defense and offense both had lapses and the Texans committed some drive-crippling penalties, but that's why they are playing in the 4th game of the preseason in the first place. Most of the guys that played extended time last night ideally won't be on the field much during the regular season. No one was hurt badly this entire preseason, the Vikings are headed into the opener pretty much completely healthy, and I'm excited to finally see some real f*cking football.

My Predictions for the NFC North:

Green Bay Packers. - They bring back almost every starter from their Super Bowl winning team of last year, they're healthy, and Aaron Rodgers is still getting better. It is going to be very tough to beat this Packers team as long as they stay healthy. I expect them to win the division and compete for home-field advantage in the playoffs. Damn, that last sentence really stings, eh?

Final Record: 13-3

Chicago Bears. -Coming off of 6 straight Pro Bowls, Lance Briggs is now requesting a trade as of today and creating a lovely distraction for my most hated team. Roy Williams was supposed to come in and give them a legitimate receiver. Turns out he likes to drop just as many balls and suck just as badly as he did in Dallas. Vernon Gholston was supposed to have a career rebirth here as a down lineman after 3 years in NY as an outside linebacker, he's already been cut. Their offensive line is just as bad as it was last year and I do not expect them to catch the breaks they did this time around. Their defense is still the same one it has been forever, but one year older. It will always be tough to beat the Bears for our Vikings, but overall I expect them to sink back into mediocrity.

Final Record: 7-9

Detroit Lions. - I'll say it straight up, Matthew Stafford looks like a f'ing stud horse this preseason. By all accounts, he is making some pretty sick throws so far and if he stays healthy, this could be a playoff contender. These are the Lions though, and until I see Matt Stafford make it through more than a quarter of a regular season of football, I can't just hand them a nice prediction. Their defensive backfield is still awful and again, these are the Lions. Detroit is just a black hole for any positive possibility. 

Final Record: 8-8

Minnesota Vikings. - Call me a homer, but I have high hopes for this year's team. Donny Mac looks comfortable as our quarterback, moreso than he ever did in Washington. People so soon forget how great of a player he was before last season. Adrian Peterson is not declining. He will still be the best runner in the league. Last year, sh*t went all haywire for the entire team and it seemed like everything that could possibly go wrong, did. Sure, that seems to happen to the Vikings a lot, but in my time as a fan we have always bounced back quickly. I think Percy Harvin will establish himself as an elite weapon in the league this year, Bill Musgrave will get a lot more out of the entire offense in general than Bevell or the KAO ever did, and maybe the defense will even make some plays. This year ain't our year, but it won't be anywhere near as ugly as it was last year. We will compete for the playoffs and maybe even pull out a playoff win before getting bounced by a more elite team like the Falcons, Packers or Eagles. It bears repeating though that this season will be without a doubt, more fun to watch than last season. I guarantee that.

Final Record: 10-6

NFC Championship: Packers 34, Eagles 20

AFC Championship: Ravens 27,  Jets 17


Super Bowl: Packers 24, Ravens 20. I'm sorry to say that as I look at this Packers team and think about how they tore through the playoffs while still missing some important players, I can't help but feel like as long as they are healthy they will be the best team in the league. Jermichael Finley is a beast of a TE and if he stays on the field he will make the Pro Bowl, mark my words. Aaron Rodgers is still going to get better, which is scary. He is amazing at eluding pass rushers in the pocket, throwing on the run and hitting his receivers where only they can make a play on the ball. Damn him for being a Packer.The Falcons and Eagles also have a good chance of making a run in the playoffs. The Falcons' offense and the Eagles' secondary both have scary potential.The Ravens have been close to getting over the hump (a.k.a. the Steelers) for the past two years, and I believe this year might finally be their year. They added a great deep threat in Lee Evans that might still have something in him as well as Andre Gurode for their OL. They were only a play or two away from bouncing the Steelers last year in the playoffs, and I'm sayin' this year is the year Joe Flacco finally outduels Big Ben. The Pats have a good chance as always, given they don't blow their third straight home playoff game. The Steelers and Jets will also be in the mix, but I'm predicting how the season is going to end a week before the regular season opener. Take it for what it is. In the NFL, anything can happen. That's why we all love it. I know I'll probably be wrong, but if I'm right, I get to brag about it forever like some kind of football prophet. It's worth the gamble.

Now, it's Friday night and my only day off until Tuesday. Here's a little Ludacris for ya. Have a good Friday night... it's a celebration, bitches.